We love hearing and sharing your stories. We want to find out how people are adapting to their ‘new normal’, what changes they’re making and what they’re learning. Each week, we share a story with you, from people in different jobs (or not in jobs for some), in different places, with different experiences. If you’re interested in sharing your story, we’d love to hear how the ‘new normal’ is for you.
What’s your name and what do you do?
Tessa and I’m a part-time Senior HR Manager in the City of London – and a recently appointed Family Court Magistrate
How did you start your day today?
I got up before 7 – washed, dressed, fed the dog and then switched on my laptop, as I’m working from home for the foreseeable future, because a) all my company are currently working from home and b) because I am the sole carer for my partner, who is shielded and c) I am currently on stand-down as a newly-appointed Magistrate, whilst there are no f2f Court sittings.
What was a typical day like for you pre Covid-19?
I would have a 4½– 5 hr round commute to London three days a week, and the other days I would have a bit of a lengthy journey to visit my elderly father (at least once a week), keep my partner company and I was also scheduled to sit in Court at least one day every fortnight.
And what is a typical day like now?
The three days I work, I sit at my laptop for 10/11 hours – barely moving. The other 4 days, I queue (very orderly and at 2m distance) for the food shop, the pharmacy and the post office. I have fun and games on-line trying to order food deliveries for my father. I talk to my family and/or friends most days by phone or social media. I walk the dog, do some gardening, do a crossword, or some more of the jigsaw puzzle, try to get some other exercise on my bike – but I am eating and drinking too much, and I feel rather too much like a couch potato!
What’s been the biggest change to your life (working and personal) in light of Covid-19?
During all my 40+ years working, I have never worked from home, so this is a big change for me. I am also an extrovert, so I miss the face-to-face interaction with people.
How have you personally had to adapt to accommodate what’s happening?
Learn to be less of a luddite and be rather more digitally savvy! And expand my waistbands!
And what have been the biggest challenges (working and personal)?
I find not having any physical divide between work and home difficult enough, but having also had two family losses within 10 days, less than 6 months ago (one expected in a way because my mother was aged 88, but my daughter was only 26), I am finding it even more difficult, and I seem to be resenting work “invading” my refuge and my grief.
What do you miss most about your life pre Covid 19 (working and personal)?
I think I was using work and life in general as a bit of a crutch before lockdown! I would leave home for work at 6.30am and didn’t get back until gone 8pm, usually spending at least one night up in town meeting family and friends. I was also doing the lengthy trip visiting my bereaved father at least once or twice a week. For the past 6 months, I had also been fitting in all my Magistrate’s training and after having been sworn-in, I was just itching to get going with the challenge of something new and so worthwhile!
What surprisingly good things have emerged in your life since this began?
I am surprised that I feel content at home! On my non-work days, I feel better able to relax – and my disabled partner and I seem to have established a nice, comfortable rhythm. Maybe this is what life should be like………….!?
What have you learnt about yourself during this?
I don’t want to spend the rest of my life commuting and/or taking on any more work challenges! After being a workaholic for most of my life, and supposedly “retiring” twice, I’m ready to finally let go of the workplace! I have my voluntary Magistrate’s duties that I can fulfil and where I am sure I will feel needed and fulfilled! And maybe, just maybe, I’ll find the time and the space to grieve properly.
I’m also learning ballet – but don’t let anyone tell you it’s easy – I think my visions of beautifully floating across the stage have been fatally and horribly dashed!
What do you hope we as a society learn from this situation?
To stop being busy for the sake of being busy! And to be kinder to each other, and ourselves!
What has helped you to cope with your situation?
My partner, my family and all my dear friends
What message would you like to pass onto others?
Just to say again “Stop being busy for the sake of being busy!” and “Be kinder to yourself and to others”
Finally, what’s on your ‘Playlist’:
Song? – Paul Simon’s “Call me Al” – it’s great for lifting my mood
Favourite meal? – Far too many favourite meals (food and drink has become an attraction and a distraction!)
Book? – Philip Pullman’s “His Dark Materials” books
Thing that just makes you happy! – Sit in my garden in the evening sun with my partner, my dog and a glass of Rose wine!
